Stories of Hope
Please enjoy these personal accountings from some of our wonderful foster parents and children.
“On Foster Parenting”
Laura is a foster parent with A Better Way. She has cared for several children spanning over sixteen years and has adopted two of her foster children. Laura recently spoke to A Better Way Social Worker about her experience being a foster and adoptive parent.
When asked why she became a foster parent, Laura replied, “I was working for the Oakland Unified School District as an Outreach Consultant working with at-risk students. We had a student who had been in ten different foster homes, and he was only six years old. I said to myself, “I think I can do better than that. If I had a child I could really help him or her. So I became a foster parent. While it is challenging working with the children, parents, social workers and the many doctors, I love every moment that I am helping children.”
Laura was the foster parent to two boys that she eventually adopted. Her family is extremely supportive of her and are very involved and helpful with the children she fosters. Laura is still a foster parent and cares primarily for infants. When asked what advice she has to give to potential foster or adoptive parents, she replied, “It’s such wonderful and rewarding work to be doing if you love children. You must have a great love for children and a heart to want to help children find their place in life.”
“Our Family Story”
John and I decided to adopt because I was unable to have children and we really wanted to have a family together. We started out with an agency in San Francisco which turned out to be a farce and after a year we had not seen any children. My friend recommended us to A Better Way because she had adopted a little girl right out of the hospital and she raved about the agency. Our home study and paperwork was all done in about six months and we were submitting our home study for children. We found “Emilio”, an eight year old boy, and within three months he was in our home. Six months later we adopted him and he has been our son for a year and a half.
A Better Way had him set up with a great therapist, found us a volunteer tutor, and helped us find doctors, a dentist and orthodontist. Emilio had several learning challenges including ADHD and in one year we were able to mainstream him out of the special education program and he is doing terrific at his new school and his teachers love him.
Emilio had difficulty bonding at first and this was difficult for me as his mother. One of his therapists gave me a great book to read, I attended some of the great workshops offered at A Better Way and they recommended their adoptive parents support group which was free and very helpful. Now Emilio is truly bonded to us both. When he wakes up in the morning he rushes out of his room to give me a big hug and kiss to say good morning. We are his parents now and he is secure and happy.
We were so happy with Emilio that we wanted to find him a brother. We are presently fostering (with the intent of adopting) a nine year old boy. He has lived with us for a little over two months. Emilio has moments when he wishes it was only him, but mostly they play together and get along great! Our new foster son has made the transition pretty easily. He is not very affectionate and still calls me by my first name, but I have been through all of that before with Emilio and I know with time it will all work itself out. A Better Way has always been very supportive and they truly love these children.
On the day Emilio was adopted the social worker showed up with several signed items from the San Francisco Giants, specifically Barry Bonds, and we received free tickets to a ball game. During the game Emilio’s name came up in lights on the big scoreboard welcoming him to our family, and he got to sit on the Giant’s mascot Lucille’s lap. What a day that was and he still talks about it. His social worker Patricia came to several of his little league games and always made him feel special. His CASA worker still buys him presents for Christmas and his birthday and still visits him occasionally. Adoption has been the best decision we have ever made!
-written by Nanette
I entered foster care when I was three years old and stayed in foster care for five years before being adopted. When first entering a new home I felt weird but when I settled in I thought I would be adopted but it never happened. I had six placements before I was finally adopted. People were nice to me and I lived in nice neighborhoods. I didn’t like that I used to get hurt by the other children in the homes I lived with. One foster dad was spanking me and my brother so we had to move out one day without warning.
My adoptive family is a nice family. We go to exciting places a lot. My dad is going to coach our baseball team and he taught me how to hit a ball. We have a dog Maverick and he sleeps with me. I really liked my social worker. She came to some of my baseball games and played catch with me when she visited. She brought me presents and made my adoption day fun.
- written by “Emilio” (10 years old)
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