Women’s History Month: Honoring our Founder

Shahnaz Mazandarani founded A Better Way in 1996.

In 1987 Congress designated March as Women’s History Month – an invitation to highlight the contributions of women to events in history and contemporary society. I was 19 at the time. Like most people I know, my childhood – and my life – have been shaped by the strong, intelligent, creative, and nurturing women who surrounded me. They were the problem-solvers, the peaceful warriors, the teachers, the creators, and the huggers.

My mother passed nearly ten years ago. At 53, I still love and miss her with the heart of a child. She was my north star. My mother taught me that the strengths of humanity are found not in the accomplishments of individuals but in the communities they build. She surrounded me with an ecosystem of strong women who worked for the common good. Throughout my life, women like these would be my guides, my mentors, and my heroes.

I met one such woman 16 years ago when I joined the team A Better Way.

Shahnaz Mazandarani – founder of A Better Way – has a story that everyone should hear from her own lips, and I hesitate to even attempt to summarize it here. She grew up in Iran living under a regime that oppressed and suppressed women in the extreme. She also lived under the roof of a father who – though he loved her greatly – challenged her innate drives for achievement, independence, and equality.

When Shahnaz declared her intention to emigrate to the United States, her father reminded her that she was a daughter… a woman. Without his support, which he refused to give, she would face a series of insurmountable barriers. She never defied her father, but one by one she overcame each barrier he pointed out – alone or with the help other others. When she finally came to him with her passport, visa, and travel plans in place, he embraced her and congratulated her as “my son.” A double-edged compliment that honored her as an individual by diminishing what it means to be a woman.

Shahnaz made her way to the United States twice, and on second trip she stayed. During her adulthood she faced great struggles in her home country and in the US. In Iran, after she’d returned from her first trip to the US, she joined the protests against oppression and was a political prisoner for a time. Her brother – also a dissident – was executed by the Shah’s regime – as were many of her friends. In the US, with very limited English, she faced xenophobia, poverty, and sexism. But Shahnaz drew on her strength. She faced every day as a challenge to overcome. She learned English; she advanced her education; she worked long hours; she secured food and housing for herself and her children; and she cultivated a purposeful career – helping children and families in or at risk of entering the Child Welfare System.

A Better Way was about ten years old when I came aboard. I knew right away that I had found my home. Shahnaz understood the importance of high standards AND of mutual support to reach those standards. Over the 15 years we worked together, I had the privilege of seeing her strengths in action every day. From the pains and challenges of her own history, she drew vision, compassion, and drive. With each program we started, Shahnaz set out to ensure that we offered something transformative and loving to children and families. As these programs taught us about unaddressed areas of need, she built new programs just outside our edges. In this way, A Better Way has grown organically to what we are today.

I spoke with Shahnaz last week about this journey, and about her contributions as a strong woman in leadership. I reflected a list of her strengths: Her commitment to excellence. Her tireless energy. Her business acumen and strong powers of negotiation. Her genuine humanity that allowed her to lead, laugh, cry, hug, debate, and reflect with true greatness. What she wanted to focus on was something else. Shahnaz emphasized two points that she feels are most important as we think about A Better Way’s place in Women’s History:

First, she said she has always supported our staff in their pursuit of professional training and academic advancement. “This is important for everyone, but especially for women.” Over the years Shahnaz has counseled countless women to go after their dreams. She has watched women who started as a receptionists and entry level staff gain their graduate degrees and take on more and more responsibility. Some became managers or Program Directors at A Better Way. Others went on to opportunities elsewhere. “It doesn’t matter if they leave A Better Way,” she told me. “We want to help them know that they can do it! They can grow so they can make more of an impact in the world… here or anywhere.”

The second thing Shahnaz wanted to emphasize is the need for a much broader change in our world’s view of women. “One woman can be strong and can achieve a lot. She can also help other people achieve their dreams. Women help each other in this way. But it is always against the expectation of society that we will not succeed. Or that if we do it is because we are exceptional women… ‘Almost like men.’ This implies that we are less than men in the eyes of society. But that is not a problem with us. That is a problem with society’s eyesight. Women are not less than men. We will continue to make history. We will continue to lead and succeed. But until all of society changes that perspective… until women are just naturally seen as equals… then the success is only partial.”

A Better Way is a community of people who have been directly or indirectly inspired by Shahnaz and her vision for societal improvement. And each of us carries a bit of her torch. Thank you Shahnaz for making history.

David Channer, LCSW 22065
President & CEO
A Better Way